Today I opened a bank account. It was fun.
Here’s a taste of a spirited dialogue I had with the clerk, and later, the manager:
- So you’re charging me to deposit money with you?
- Yes, that’s right.
- And when I deposit money, lend you essentially, you give me 0% in interest, but when I borrow money from you I pay you 6.5%??
- Yes, but during the last wave of the pandemic it was 12%…
- It’s a terrible deal in either case!
- Well, in all the other banks it’s the same. Just ask around, they’re no different.
- Are you saying you work like a cartel?
- * Gazes around the room then clears his throat, and shuffles some paper*.
- Another question… the Go-Green account costs more than the normal one, is that right?
- yes *stares into screen*
- so I pay extra so that you don’t invest my money in the destruction of the planet?
- *distractedly, eyes on screen* oh yeah, it’s a new policy which we’re excited to offer.
(Postscript: In the end the clerk had to call the manager to help explain things to me: “I can assure you”, he assured me, “we are not running an unethical business”).